Spottedheart's Struggle
by myamyamya123
Summary: A poor she-cat had lost her mate many moons ago. When she finds out she can go to the Dark Forest to be with him, she doesn't hesitate to go. But what happens when she can never return? Will the forest corrupt her? Will her ex-mate ever take her back?


Spottedheart's struggle

A short story by Myamyamya123

There was always a cool breeze blowing, whistling through the ears of the young she-cat. Long, feathery grass tickled her legs as she gazed ahead. The sweet smell of roses carassed her scent glands as she heard the gentle voices of other warriors who surrounded her. Each of them, young looking, healthy happy. They had bright stars glittering toward the tips of their pelt, their eyes glowing so bright as if the moon had kissed them. She too retained this appearance.

She was an older she-cat, her pelt lightly dappled with oranges and browns, all on a white base. The tips of this pelt was sparkling, a light. A sweet aqua blue hue, the color of her eyes had surrounded her and her eyes. Stars trailed after her paws.

There was a reason she, and all the other cats here were like this. They had all perished, and went to a wonderful place called Starclan. Here, all the clans could combine and become one. These lucky cats must have followed the warrior code, and stayed loyal to their clan, they earn a special place here. These cats remain here until they fade into nothing, but that isn't until they find their true peace. Spottedheart was among these starry warriors, though unlike the rest of them, she wasn't happy.

She once had a mate. Hazeleyes was his name. He was the love of her life, they even had a son. She loved him, and he loved her. But, the young tom was too obsessed with strength. He wanted to be strong, and that's all he saw in a cat. He wanted to see his clan strong, and he'd do anything he could to make sure every cat was strong, even if it meant killing them. This was his fault.

He tried to take over the clan, and make them all strong, but he was stopped by Gravityclan's leader, Rushingstar. She killed him, right before Spottedheart's eyes. She watched him suffer, and even if he seemed at peace, Spottedheart had found that he didn't make it to Starclan. He went to a place where cats are not accepted. A much darker, scarier place. This is where Spottedheart, the dappled she-cat was staring.

There was a border with a drastic change to scenery. Stars protected this border so no cat who did not belong could cross the line. On the other side of the border was a dark, damp place. Instead of the thick grass here, it was spotty, dried and dead. Dark trees hung overhead, rotting, they slumped over, dark and leafless. There was no light other then the faint glow of mushrooms growing at the base of the dying trees. There was no sign of prey anywhere nearby, from what Spottedheart could see. Shadows slipped to and fro like minnows in a pond, and assuming those were once cats that belonged to clans, it sent shivers down Spottedheart's spine. A voice from behind startled her.

"Spottedheart, you're not thinking of going in there are you?" Asked a large silver and white tom whisking around her to give her a friendly nudge.

It was Silverlight, her brother. "Leave me alone, please. That's all I want." She sighed softly.

"Wait... You really were thinking of going in _there?_ As in, The place of no stars? Spottedheart, they'll kill you a second time if you go in there. And you know that once yo-" He was cut off by Spottedheart's venomous hiss.

"It's not the forest I'm worried about! I-It's him... I need to see him again." She sighed.

The tom shifted positions to sit down close beside her, gazing into the forest. "That cat was a murderous traitor. I never got what you saw in him."

"'That cat' has a name! Hazeleyes was not a murderer, or a traitor. He loved the clan... He loved me, and Owlpaw. He only wanted us to be strong, like he was." She murmured, half to herself.

"The clan was strong enough as is, he weakened them. He killed our leader for Starclan's sake! He nearly destroyed the clan on his own. He is not a cat to be loved, but feared. Owlpaw would agree." Retorted Silverlight, he looked into her blue eyes.

"Owlpaw loved his father, he would have understood. Unlike you! I've made my decision, I'm going in. There's nothing you, or any other cat can do to stop me!" She snapped, her voice harsh, and full of hatred.

The dappled she-cat got to her paws storming past the troubled tom. She started into the Place of no stars before stopping abruptly. "I'm sorry I have to do this Silverlight. I'll miss you, and everyone else here. And please... When Owlpaw gets here, tell him that I love him, no matter what he does." Spottedheart whispered, and with one last look, she approached the border.

The air felt cold and stiff. The border was forbidding, a black mist forming through the darkness that had a particular foreboding sense to it. This made the dappled femme's hair stand on end. As she placed one paw over, her paw went entirely numb and she pulled it back with wide eyes. Glancing back she saw Silverlight advancing toward her. But for some odd reason, he was moving in slow motion. She needed to hurry. Swallowing any fear or regret she had, she leapt in with her eyes shut.

The world seemed to swirl and go black. After landing on a broken branch, this startled the she-cat enough to wake her. She grunted in pain looking around. She was alone, the border before her. Silverlight stared at her with wide eyes before backing away, sadness and horror in his eyes. There was nothing he could do for her now.

Spottedheart looked down at her paws. They were no longer trailing stars, but rather a dark, black mist. The scars that she had died in, the scars that had come during an attack, while she was protecting the Nursery, and Owlkit-now Owlpaw, were now highly visible, as if she had just got them. One on her shoulder and chest, then one long one along her belly. They hurt again, very badly, as if someone were sticking thistles in them. Her blue hue was now fused with black, it swirled around her instead of the star tipped dappled fur she once had. Her eyes had gone from starry blue to a menacing black and gray. She had changed into one of them. She started moving, her body, obviously tired protested but she managed to ignore it.

The she-cat walked and walked, she was lost in this maze. She was right, there we no Fresh-kill anywhere. The trees branches seemed to hang down trying to reach for her, she could see cats moving to and fro, ignoring her existence in their home.

Much time had passed by this point and the she-cat began giving up hope. There were weak voices in her head, though as time passed they grew louder and louder, they spoke of terrible, evil things. Discouraging things, things she wished that she would never have to hear. She thought of her love, Hazeleyes, perhaps he had faded by now. But, against all odds, she saw him.

"Again. I want to see you twist your body as you do it!" Snapped a brown tom, he had a white patch over his eye, a scar crossing it. He was a smaller tom, though well built and muscular. His body was scarred though, torn ears and ripped fur. He had a scowl planted on his face. His eyes were hazel and black. That familiar black smoke trailed from his paws and distorted the hazel glow already coming from him. In front of him was a smaller black tom, he wasn't quite as muscular as the larger one, but he also wasn't from the Place of no stars either. He had no blue and black smoke. He seemed to lack scars and was healthy. His icy blue eyes were bright and eager to learn. He was hardly older then a kit. A pure black pelt with a single patch of white fur on his chest.

"H-Hazeleyes...?" Whispered Spottedheart, perhaps it was another illusion. She was going mad. She wasn't afraid to admit it. But this was the first time she had seen one so vivid... and real.

The tom turned his head upon hearing his name. Hazel eyes met blue as he saw Spottedheart. He slowly padded up leaving the confused kit behind. "Who...are you? You seem... Familiar." Whispered the tom gazing at Spottedheart's slender body.

"I-I'm Spottedheart, I was your mate... When we were in Gravityclan." She whispered.

Hazeleyes, as he was known as, hesitated. He stared into those eyes. "Spottedheart...?" He sat down, his hindquarters causing a soft plop as he placed his paw over his muzzle in thought. He tried to collect his shattered memories. "We...Were in Gravityclan together... You were my only friend. We played and... I fell in love with you. W-We had Owlkit... And..." He trailed off before getting to his paws. "And they killed me." He unsheathed his claws, hate returning to his voice. "They took everything I had when they exiled me. Before they came back and they killed me! I should have clawed every last one of her lives while I had the chance!" He smirked, his voice came out in small whispers. "But they haven't seen the last of me!" It rose as he lifted his head revealing the claw marks that took his life. "They will crumble under my paws!" He approached Spottedheart and touched his nose to her ear shyly, as if to make sure he was comfortable.

Spottedheart only stared, her eyes closing as she felt his nose, it was cold, lifeless. But she still smelled his scent and that was all that mattered. She pressed close to him, before the words of Hazeleyes stunned her.

"But... You did nothing to end Rushingstar after my death. I thought I could trust you, to get revenge for me... You're no better then them..." He pulled his head away unsheathing his claws. With a jerking motion, he pushed her hard against the ground and she gasped in pain. He pressed hard against her chest. "So, I'll have to end you too." He whispered in her ear. He touched his nose to hers for a long moment.

"H-Hazeleyes, no! Please... I couldn't, for Owlpaw. He needed me there for him. I left Starclan for you. B-But... This isn't the you I remember." She whispered softly gazing at those corrupted hazel eyes.

"You idiotic rat! You were nothing more then a distraction, nobody suspected me... But that's okay. We won't have to worry about you anymore!" He raised his paw about to slash them across her throat, about to cause her the same pain he did when he died.

Spottedheart had to think. She had to think fast. She did the first thing she could. As he brought his unsheathed paw down, she scooped a paw of dirt and flung it into his eyes. He writhed in pain and fell back, his eyes burning. She scrambled to her paws and raced off. The black tom pursing after her.

Spottedheart ran and ran, she had lost the tom but she still ran. She ran through the shadows stopping training sessions and fights amoung the cats. She ran through the trees and the branches. She ran until she reached the border. Starclan awaited, a glowing border on the other side. She ran to the border. She made a terrible mistake. She only wanted to go home. She attempted to leap through the barrier only to have it push her back. She hit the ground with a thud. She gasped as she tried again, and again. Each time she got nowhere. She stared with wide eyes. Silverlight's voice echoed in her head. _"You know, once you go in there you-"_ She finished the sentance in her mind. "_You can never leave again"_ She was trapped. She collapsed on the ground. The voices grew louder, and she let them. She didn't fight anymore.

"Hazeleyes still loves me... He only got upset... Yeah! He loves me so much... He loves me... He loves... me..." She began to tremble, a smile creasing her once sweet face. The voices obscured her mind, she had gone mad. "Gravityclan will... pay... Hazeleyes will be mine!" She broke into laughter, a mad laughter, not a normal one.

Much, much time had passed since Spottedheart had become trapped. A battle had happened, Hazeleye's own apprentice turned on him and killed him a second time. Spottedheart knew she had to take matters into her own paws. She began training her own cats to turn on Gravityclan. She saw the glow in her apprentice's eyes. She saw his determination and his ambition. She would do what Hazeleyes didn't. She saw Owlpaw again, his warrior name now, Owlscreech. He had lived a long life and eventually died as a deputy. She had become so corrupted though, she didn't remember him. But that didn't mean that Silverlight didn't keep his promise. Owlscreech knew that Spottedheart loved him. And he saw what she was doing to the clans. He would take care of his mother.

A second battle, as bloody and miserable as the first. Many cats were lost, one of which including Spottedheart. Owlscreech had descended from Starclan. He looked so much like Hazeleyes. He was brown and white with blue eyes. He was a strong warrior, brave and intelligent. He tried to talk to Spottedheart but she laughed in his face and tried to take away his life a second time. He wouldn't allow this. He'd end this once and for all. He pinned her and he killed her a second time.

In those last moments, Spottedheart returned to normal. She saw herself, a young kit. She was playing with Hazelkit. He had just moved to the clan and she wanted to be his friend. She then saw herself as an apprentice, she and Hazelpaw training hard. He was so strong, and sometimes when they play fought, he'd accidently hurt her. He'd apologize and help her though and they'd move on. Next, there was a flashback of them two together, he was admitting his love for her. And she and him eventually became mates. Eventually the bodies of cats flashed by, Blazestar, Mistyhollow, Applekit, Dawnkit, and Flowerkit. Finally she saw her son, Owlkit. How happy she and Hazeleyes were. She saw Hazeleye's death and how he told her how much he loved her in his last moments. She saw herself growing old, and more sad. And eventually being killed. Then, she saw how she left Starclan, and everything she knew. Finally, she saw herself grow more, and more corrupted. She had one wish, before the world as she knew it would disappear. She wished, things could have gone differently... Her world faded to black.

Bright light nearly blinded Spottedheart. Her head hurt as she lifted her head and gazed around. She saw she was in the Gravityclan nursery. She looked over and saw a silver bundle of fur, it was Silverlight, but he was small, only a kit. She looked up and saw her mother, she was healthy, alive again. Spottedheart looked down at herself. Her paws were tiny and small, her pelt free of scars and shiny. She was also nothing more then a kit. She was Spottedkit.

She looked up, a golden she-cat entered the den, she seemed familar. Following behind her were three kits. Mousekit, Fawnkit,...and Hazelkit. He was only a kit again too. He seemed confused, as if he had never been there before. Spottedheart remembered this day, this was the day she met Hazeleyes! She... got to meet him, the real him, all over again.


End file.
